The art of growing up?

Incompetent or just an infant?

“As soon as we believe we KNOW, we limit ourselves. When we can stay in a state of not knowing, we open up to infinite possibilities. ”
Harry Uhane Jim (Wise Secrets of Aloha)

I was visiting with a friend the other day, who had heard me channel the night before. It was the first time she had attended one of my events in about six months and was commenting on how much the the work had changed and deepened over that time. During the course of the conversation, I mentioned that I still felt like an infant in the channeling world. She immediately responded with concern that I still felt incompetent at something that I did so well. This response really surprised me, as I had never intended for a minute that I felt incompetent, simply that I knew I still had plenty to learn.

That little exchange got me thinking! Yes, I have been developing my channel ability for over several years now, but know there is so much more that I can do with continued practice. I wonder, how many time do we identify ‘not knowing’ with incompetence, rather then infancy? Let me explain…

We do not judge a baby just learning to sit up, as incompetent because they do not know how to feed themselves, or walk. We understand that they are at a certain stage of development, and learning to sit is perfect at that moment. We know these other skills will come later and are content to allow the baby to take the time to develop.

Then why is it that we judge ourselves as incompetent if we are just starting out? And continue place these harsh judgments as we travel along the path of learning? What are we waiting for? Some arbitrary moment or feeling to  announce that we are now competent? Society often bestows the ‘honour of competence’ upon us in the form of a certificate or diploma, which validates that someone else now thinks we are competent. However, no about of degrees, diplomas, and certificates can bestow competence unless we feel it ourselves.

What if we changed out thinking about where we are along the path to Infant rather than Incompetent? This reflects that we have not yet learned everything; that we understand we will still continue to shift and grow, but also acknowledges that the current understanding is appropriate for the amount of learning done.

I like this much better, if feels so much softer and more supportive. Less black and white about knowing or not, and open to the possibility of continuing to learn and grow.

So back to our conversation about being an infant at channeling, I realized in this conversation, that I do feel good about what I can do, very good in fact. I have a solid connection and provide valuable advice. I do not have the illusion that I have arrived and have nothing more to learn. I do not believe that I have perfected my art, rather than I have reached a suitable level of competence for the number of years I have been doing the work. And this supports me in where  I am, but keeps the door open for there to be so much more.

Try it on! You just might find a good fit in allowing yourself to be the infant when you are learning something new. And know that you are absolutely competent right where you are at, with what you have learned. Knowing there is more to learn is not incompetent, it is honest! And it also keeps that door open to infinite possibilities. When we can acknowledge all that we don’t know, without judging self for not knowing, we set up a great environment to support ourselves to expand our learning and competence.

If you wish to be in the presence of this growth on an ongoing basis, consider joining me in the Inner Circle, where the focus is staying open to the infinite possibilities.

Bonnie Bogner, October 7, 2016